[MKSixer]

My father was traveling internationally for a state department project designed to raise the minimal education levels in a couple of 3rd world countries. Each time he returned home, the TSA would take him into the back for the nearly full treatment out of his traveling team of 10 or so university professors. At that point my dad was still 6-2 and a powerful figure of a man who, while kind, doesn't suffer fools. The third time this occurs with the same Keystone Kops within the same 6 month period, he loudly opines while he is being rousted to the back, "While you are hassling me to see if I'm carrying contraband, I'm fairly certain 10 drug smugglers have successfully penetrated your, "security". And yes...he used air quotes. The entire area laughed hysterically and made derisive comments about the TSA.

They never stopped him again. Idiots.

Pre-TSA but customs, "security", nonetheless. I got stopped when returning from Spain as a young man with my new collection of daggers and scimitars. They were all confiscated and I'm certain they are adorning the walls of some security guard as I type this.