Bumping this thread. I am experiencing the same issues.
New spark plugs and coils, air intake filter is new. 44K miles on the clock for my 2018 X2
It does not happen every morning, but it does happen from time to time at random. The description of the issue is the same. Hesitation, roughness - and on occasion stalling - when the car is placed into gear (reverse in my case).
Interested on knowing if OP finally resolved this issue, and whether the software update worked.
Other than a recurring turn signal failure issue (fixed by replacing the tail light assembly - done at the dealer under CPO), the car has been reliable.
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